Hello..........Support?

So, I post my situation on my local ICAN (International Cesarean Awareness Network)listserv. Stating that I want some positive affirmation that having a posterior baby can be done and just basically asking for good, positive vibes. Instead, I get responses like - "No one can make you have a c-section, you need to fight for this" and have you tried this that and that? Hello!!! I am a day and a half away (yesterday) from this scheduled c-section. You don't think I haven't tried to avoid a c-section, and how in the hell can I try chiropractors, acupuncturists, yoga, spinning babies, eating everything under the sun that is thought to ripen your cervix, walking, loads of sex, rebozo methods, hybnobabies, etc..when 1) I just found out YESTERDAY that the baby is posterior and 2) I have a little boy that I am chasing around all day when I don't have a babysitter??

I posted on there for support and came back feeling like shit because now I feel like some of the people on there felt like I hadn't done enough and haven't gone to real battle for this vbac. I am both physically and mentally exhausted from this journey this week. It has really taken a toll and I am just trying to have good, positive thoughts these last few hours before the baby comes (either way). I do not want to go into the OR hating my midwives or hating this OB/GYN because they are "making" me have a c-section. I want to go in thinking positive things and being excited to meet this new little person who we are bringing into this world.

Most of the people who were naysayers and I felt weren't very helpful are doulas. Which seems odd to me because they are supposed to be supportive! Especially since I have posted NUMEROUS times on a local doula board about hiring a doula and NO ONE responded to help a fellow doula out, but once I mention that I just need some support because I am having a c-section (most likely) - I get jumped on from them, the same people who are on the local doula board, who did not respond to my many many requests. Weird. And, I am not dogging all doulas - because we were able to find two very lovely ones - a labor doula in training and a postpartum doula that we are using. I just think it's bizarre that when you are in a field where you are supposed to be supportive, instead you make the person feel even more crappy than before.

Anyway, this is a total negative post. I have 24 more hours before going to the OR. I needed to vent to get these thoughts out of my head, so I can have a wonderful last day alone with my little bud. I am going to think positive thoughts. I do have a couple of appts today to try to get this baby to turn, I am going to continue my exercises, and I am going to continue to drink my tea, but if the baby doesn't turn - I think I have come to peace that tomorrow I will be a mom to two, instead of one, and anyway this baby comes into the world, it will be fine.