Well, maybe the crazy acupuncturist had a point...

Huh. And, double-huh. As I said before, I was trying to get really good at not looking for any signs or symptoms. I wrote off the acupuncturist as being a little nutty, but did heed her advice on not eating eggplant (although, it's not my first choice in foods anyway). So, maybe not looking for any signs, made me miss signs. Obviously, the two negative pregnancy tests weren't signs. And, the lack of nausea, breast tenderness, and headaches weren't signs. But, maybe, just maybe I should have paid attention to the tiredness that came over me, the bloating, and the girls being a little full. That's right, after one year and however many months, 3 failed IUIs, 4 months of being on crazy clomid, 1 ectopic pregnancy, and 1 chemical pregnancy, I am officially pregnant. Approximately 5 weeks, 1 day. I still can't believe it. I am extremely nervous. I am extremely (cautiously) excited. I want it to stick. I want it to be real.

Before I got the positive, I partied hard. Why wouldn't I have? I was just told we had to go through IVF. So, I was living it up before I had to hand my life over to a series of tests, needles, ultrasounds, poking, and prodding. Even though the ultrasound today showed that everything looked good, I think I am still going to worry. Our next appt is next week. With each bloodwork and ultrasound, I have gotten less nervous, so hopefully this appointment will do the same. But, for now, I am going to try to stick with my not looking for signs. I don't want to worry if I don't have morning sickness, or if my boobs don't hurt, or if I have an occasional cramp. I do not want to let my worries get the best of me. I will not let them take over my life. I am going to let myself be happy, think positively, and be gracious that for whatever reason, now is when my body said - "ok, it's time. Now, you are pregnant."